Friday, April 08, 2005
The Duchess of Back Burner
One of the advantages of insomnia is that you get to watch stuff on TV as it is happening in Europe or Australia or the Middle East. For me, this means watching an occasional golf telecast from Australia or Dubai. You see, when the important stuff like Wimbledon or The Open Championship are to be shown, the TV networks arrange for coverage to begin at 9:00 A.M. Eastern time.
With funerals, the options are more limited. I mean, the guy is dead and you have the Cardinals and dignitaries and a huge crowd assembled and eventually, the Port-a-potties are not enough. Besides, if you are the President of the US, or even a former President and quite a bit older as George H. W. Bush 41 is, you don't get up to pee in the middle of the Pope's funeral.
So, the Pope's funeral was broadcast at 4:00 A.M. Eastern time. Mind you, we had already moves clocks ahead. The Spring Ahead day is my favorite day of the year and I love it when we have light early in the morning and late into the day. I never fancied being an eskimo in the winter. So, it was almost light and I didn't feel like I was up in the middle of the night although I was. That's how it is when you are wide asleep.
I woke up and turned on the TV. There was MSNBC with an outsize logo on the left reading "Funeral Mass of John Paul II" -- I was surprised that with their pretentions, it did not read "Ioannes Paulus Secundus" -- and on the right, a logo reading "LIVE MSNBC." Well, the "LIVE" was just to the right of the coffin in front of the altar in St. Peter's Basilica. It seemed incongruous. It was a funeral. The principal participant who made it possible was not live.
So, I switched to NBC. Sure enough, a sign saying "Live - NBC." Well, it's a funeral. The word "Live" doesn't belong.
Meanwhile, Katie Koorick (or however you spell the name) is making commentary. Wait a minute twit! This is a funeral ... not a sports event. We do not need a play by play or comments about how the crowd is well behaved and touched. Really.
So, I switched to C-SPAN. They had a logo: "Live - C-SPAN." Well, I figured there's no reason not to hope.
Then, I saw Chuck in the group of dignitaries. He was at the funeral rather than at his wedding to/with Camilla PB. He seemed quite chipper about it all so one wonders if it was okay with him.
CPB is, of course, to be the Duchess of Cornwall once the civil ceremony -- it would likely be decidedly uncivil if Mum attended -- is over. Meanwhile, she is the Duchess of Back Burner as Chuck postponed the wedding in favor of a funeral.
Good thing Prince Rainier's funeral isn't until next week or Chuck would have skipped a second DOC appointment -- er... that's Duchess of Cornwall -- DOC.
It turns out that Mum would rather be at the very important horse race, but she will attend the post nuptial reception. Actually, she could look at Camilla and see the horse that won.
Camilla was really quite sweet about it all. She called the Queen and said: "Hello Mum, it's Camilla." The Queen responded: "Ah yes, Mrs. Parker Bowles, what can we do for you?" Camilla persisted, "But Mum, Harry and William told me that HM in the family is code for 'Hello Mum' and told me you'd like that." The Queen was not amused, but then, these are her grandchildren.
"Oh well, Mrs. Parker Bowles, but do tell the Prince of Wales not to wear that ridiculous jacket with the red collar and the red cuffs. He looks like the doorman at the hotel in ... where was it ... Lagos, or Phuket ... well, somewhere. It's bad enough that Harry is dressing up in a suit looking like his uncle and now the Prince of Wales is dressing up like a defeated colonel from some North African army."
Camillas isn't too worried. The big argument is about who is going to wear the skirt in this family. Seems like Chuck is getting an assortment of kilts from Camilla as his wedding present.
Oh well, indeed. Here's the Duchess to be having her wedding sandwiched between two funerals. Chuck is definitely going to Monaco.
There isn't going to be little princeling out this union, is there? What an awful thought.
Cheerz...Bwana
_____________________________________________________________________________
With funerals, the options are more limited. I mean, the guy is dead and you have the Cardinals and dignitaries and a huge crowd assembled and eventually, the Port-a-potties are not enough. Besides, if you are the President of the US, or even a former President and quite a bit older as George H. W. Bush 41 is, you don't get up to pee in the middle of the Pope's funeral.
So, the Pope's funeral was broadcast at 4:00 A.M. Eastern time. Mind you, we had already moves clocks ahead. The Spring Ahead day is my favorite day of the year and I love it when we have light early in the morning and late into the day. I never fancied being an eskimo in the winter. So, it was almost light and I didn't feel like I was up in the middle of the night although I was. That's how it is when you are wide asleep.
I woke up and turned on the TV. There was MSNBC with an outsize logo on the left reading "Funeral Mass of John Paul II" -- I was surprised that with their pretentions, it did not read "Ioannes Paulus Secundus" -- and on the right, a logo reading "LIVE MSNBC." Well, the "LIVE" was just to the right of the coffin in front of the altar in St. Peter's Basilica. It seemed incongruous. It was a funeral. The principal participant who made it possible was not live.
So, I switched to NBC. Sure enough, a sign saying "Live - NBC." Well, it's a funeral. The word "Live" doesn't belong.
Meanwhile, Katie Koorick (or however you spell the name) is making commentary. Wait a minute twit! This is a funeral ... not a sports event. We do not need a play by play or comments about how the crowd is well behaved and touched. Really.
So, I switched to C-SPAN. They had a logo: "Live - C-SPAN." Well, I figured there's no reason not to hope.
Then, I saw Chuck in the group of dignitaries. He was at the funeral rather than at his wedding to/with Camilla PB. He seemed quite chipper about it all so one wonders if it was okay with him.
CPB is, of course, to be the Duchess of Cornwall once the civil ceremony -- it would likely be decidedly uncivil if Mum attended -- is over. Meanwhile, she is the Duchess of Back Burner as Chuck postponed the wedding in favor of a funeral.
Good thing Prince Rainier's funeral isn't until next week or Chuck would have skipped a second DOC appointment -- er... that's Duchess of Cornwall -- DOC.
It turns out that Mum would rather be at the very important horse race, but she will attend the post nuptial reception. Actually, she could look at Camilla and see the horse that won.
Camilla was really quite sweet about it all. She called the Queen and said: "Hello Mum, it's Camilla." The Queen responded: "Ah yes, Mrs. Parker Bowles, what can we do for you?" Camilla persisted, "But Mum, Harry and William told me that HM in the family is code for 'Hello Mum' and told me you'd like that." The Queen was not amused, but then, these are her grandchildren.
"Oh well, Mrs. Parker Bowles, but do tell the Prince of Wales not to wear that ridiculous jacket with the red collar and the red cuffs. He looks like the doorman at the hotel in ... where was it ... Lagos, or Phuket ... well, somewhere. It's bad enough that Harry is dressing up in a suit looking like his uncle and now the Prince of Wales is dressing up like a defeated colonel from some North African army."
Camillas isn't too worried. The big argument is about who is going to wear the skirt in this family. Seems like Chuck is getting an assortment of kilts from Camilla as his wedding present.
Oh well, indeed. Here's the Duchess to be having her wedding sandwiched between two funerals. Chuck is definitely going to Monaco.
There isn't going to be little princeling out this union, is there? What an awful thought.
Cheerz...Bwana
_____________________________________________________________________________
